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about

I have a couple "Rebeccas" or "Beckys" in my life that have no reason to be freaked out about this song. It's loosely based on the Daphne du Maurier novel of the same name. I didn't write it about you. I wrote it from the perspective of "the other Mrs. DeWinter" who tells the story in the book. I don't know if anyone would make that connection without me directly stating it. But that's the truth.

I'm a big fan of the novel "Rebecca." I read it in my 20s and I've returned to it often. The Hitchcock movie version with Lawrence Olivier changes the ending in a really shitty way that hurts it pretty badly. I don't like the movie. Neither should you. Read the book. It's great. At the time of writing I'm reading Tatiana De Rosnay's "Manderley Forever" which is a novelized biography of du Maurier. I recommend that too.

The song works through the lens of viewing it as a break-up song too. That's fine. That's intentional. I've wanted to write a song about the book for years and I've had the "I know I'll never forget Rebecca" refrain in my head since I was like 25. But I also didn't want my listeners (if any) to have required reading outside of the song. So I wanted this to work if you've read it or if you haven't. And I think it does.

I like the guitar solo in this one a lot, too.

lyrics

I had a dream...
A bad dream of a bad place and just one name...
"Rebecca..."

A fortnight love affair.
Such a pretty girl. I can't compare.
She's a queen.
Rebecca still surrounds me..
But she's gone.
And she's been gone for so long.
And I'm alone
where Rebecca cannot reach me.

I wake up in cold sweats.
Regrets from the outset.
I've been just a bit upset.
But I don't think I'll ever forget
Rebecca.

I can't (seem to) do anything right.
A mistake in the dark comes to the light
so everyone can see
that Rebecca's still above me.
And when I dress up nice
for a perfect night in a perfect life,
I'm haunted by her still.
Rebecca goes before me.

Her memory's a silhouette.
It's all such an ugly mess.
I'm just trying to do my best.
But I don't think I'll ever forget
Rebecca.

It's no accident that the ship sank
before I got here.
If anything's Heaven-sent it's the mercy
of losing your fear.
All it takes is one shot to prove you're not
taking what you're handed.
Whatever comes next, it's for the best,
even if no one understands it.

So let the place burn down.
And then we'll leave this town.
No sorrow left to drown.

No need for epithets.
It's just an empty threat.
I'll live to outlive this yet.
But I know I'll never forget
Rebecca.

I had a dream...
A bad dream of a bad place and just one name...
And the ashes blew up toward me upon the wind.

credits

from Almost Moving Backwards, released May 29, 2021

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Derek Brink St Louis, Missouri

If you press "Buy" and put in your price as $0.00 you can download everything here for free. Or you can pay if you want. I just want to be heard.

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