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Everybody's Wrong

from Almost Moving Backwards by Derek Brink

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As with almost ANY Derek Brink album...this is where things get dark. But oddly not as dark as my first draft...

I wrote this largely about a friend who lost her daughter. I knew both women. I'm not as close to the mom anymore. Time does that--it always sucks. It's my fault as much as anything. That's how it is...  But the daughter was on my mind when I started writing this song. I started writing and was laying my soul bare...and this came out. It felt important to say it...

But as I said above, this song almost got much darker. The original lyrics in verse two were about my relationship with my own mother, which wasn't entirely or even majority positive. But I felt a need to dial that back after listening to the first takes. Not so much because I'm uncomfortable exploring my feelings about Mom... Mostly the reason I changed it is because I don't think that version was a fair representation of the friend I lost. Her kids get to believe whatever they want to about their mom. I remember mostly the truth about mine--though sometimes it IS hard to remember, as the lyrics state.

Anyway... This one's hard for me to listen to. I'm sorry if the mix in any way suffered as a result of that.

lyrics

A good friend lost her daughter.
and I watched it almost kill her.
Though I think we always knew she would die young.
And no I will not name her;
the mother or the daughter.
Some things are better left unsung.

We lost touch, of course, my friend and me
except for anniversaries.
Now birthdays and death days feel the same.
We only talk to share the burden
of both missing the same person.
Sometimes I miss her so much, I’m ashamed.

No one tells you that it never goes away.
No one tells you that you’ll feel it every day.
Everyone wants to say that one day you’ll move on.
Someone ought to tell you that everybody’s wrong.

Now her babies are both growing up
hearing second-hand about their mother’s love.
I know that’s tough, I sorta did it too.
Sometimes love is blink and miss it
and sometimes there’s no chance to fix it.
Once somebody’s gone it’s hard to remember the truth.

I don’t mean to speak unfairly.
Love’s enough, but sometimes barely.
Words don’t speak as loudly as your sin.
You try so hard to keep it down,
to remember the good and shut bad out.
But the truth is that the worst times are
the first times you live again.

No one tells you that it never goes away.
No one tells you that you’ll feel it every day.
Everyone wants to say that one day you’ll move on.
Someone ought to tell you that everybody’s wrong.

Everybody's wrong.

Human beings are prone to suffering.
Everybody’s hurt by something.
There’s no runner-up; no second best.
It’s not the scars, it’s how you bear them,
but even those we get as children
sometimes show up darker than the rest.

No one tells you that it never goes away.
No one tells you that you’ll feel it every day.
Everyone wants to say that one day you’ll move on.
Someone ought to tell you that everybody’s wrong.

Everybody’s wrong.

credits

from Almost Moving Backwards, released May 29, 2021

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Derek Brink St Louis, Missouri

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